With a new blog comes a sense of new beginnings.
It's similar to the feeling you get when you put your new school supplies in a brand new backpack right before the first day of school.
The feeling that anything is possible...
The past year has been a whirlwind for me.
Some things were amazingly wonderful and brought great joy to my life and my world while other things brought heart break and pain that I hope to never experience again.
I fell in love with someone who I know for certain I could spend the rest of my life with.
The problem?
He hasn't discovered the same feeling yet. I don't doubt that he loves me... I just know for sure that he hasn't come to a place where he can say with any type of certainty that I'm the one. And I know this guy well enough to know that he needs to have that moment... that understanding...that clarity.
I have spent much of my adult life counseling friends through relationships: good, bad, and ugly... and I have often said that you shouldn't give up on a relationship simply because he isn't proposing tomorrow. And I'm happy to say that I'm following that advice here. I'm not giving up on him... on us... on the possibilities of a future together... But I am trying to guard my heart a bit more than I have in the past year. I'm trying to force my heart to understand that it might not get the happy ending here. It might get smashed into pieces again and I'm going to rely on it to repair itself yet again... That's what hearts are for, right?
So this blog is going to be a place where I share what's on my mind and my heart as well as what's going on in my crazy world that I call life. It's quite possible that nobody will ever read my blog and that's ok... I'm not writing this for anyone really but more so to get this "stuff" off my chest.
I named this blog Loving the Only Way I Know How for a variety reasons....
When I fall in love, I love completely, deeply, and loyally. It's truly the only way I know how.
I have felt heart break as a result of my love for others... but it's a risk that I'm willing to continue to take because I know that eventually it is going to pay off for me.
Until then....
